(Update: this competition is now closed, but you can still enter the draw for a signed copy here)
I came up with the definitive Hal Spacejock title yesterday, although sadly I don't think it'll fly. (Hal Spacejock - Up Uranus)
After HS Second Course and HS Just Desserts, my editor jokingly suggested Port and Cigars next. I promptly came back with 'The Big Bang', then realised that'd be best for book six.
For now, book four is HS Legacy and book five is HS Faulty Parts, which I just KNOW is going to lead to 'Poultry Farts' every time I open my mouth.
Anyway, I played around with 'mint' but was fresh out of ideas. I messed around with 'port' and got a headache. Cigars - well, those jokes have all been done.
That's where the fun comes in. All you have to do is suggest a title for a future Hal Spacejock novel in the comments trail. The wackier the better - they don't have to be remotely useable, I'm just after way-out craziness here.
(E.g. HS: Wrong Port, HS: Full Moon, etc.)
Just get your entry in by August 15, 2006 and I'll select a couple of winners, who will receive a signed copy of Hal Spacejock 1 OR 2 (your choice.)
If you can't think of anything, why not share the link? If someone else wins you can borrow their copy.
http://halspacejock.blogspot.com/
Technorati Tags: spacejock Writing Science Fiction Humour
Simon Haynes is the author of the Hal Spacejock and Hal Junior series (Amazon / Smashwords / other formats)
40 comments:
"Pizza Unlimited"
"A Hamburger on Her Own"
"Beef me up, Hal"
"BBQ on the Moon"
Hi Simon, these are my suggestions for today.
Have a nice day.
Ulrike
oops, should maybe mean:
"A Hamburger for Her Own"
another one:
"HS: A Treasure called Monday"
Beef me up? Groan!
Now a few of these might be unknown, me being a 'murrican and all.
HS: Listing Two Port
HS: Port of Caul
HS: Wibble Kibble
HS: Stogey Fogie
Oops,hit publish instead of preview.
Last one
HS: "As The Stomach Churns"
I've heard of that one ;-)
In a similar artery, HS: Razors and Knives
Here are a few Port ideas:
Hal Spacejock: Dodgy Port
Hal Spacejock: Star Port
Hal Spacejock: Port Man Tow
A few wacky ones:
Hal Spacejock: Arseteroid
Hal Spacejock: Watch Uranus
Hal Spacejock: Bang to rights
HS: Moons Over Purgatory (sounds dead serious that one)
HS: The 7 Light-year Itch (bit of a sports pun)
HS: Clunk goes to College
HS: Where the Spacewalk Ends (apologies to Shel)
HS: Dead at Last (hmmm, perhaps as a closer, say a book 7?)
Got a few more in me I'm sure, will post as they arise!
We're really setting the tone so far. Classy stuff :-)
Hal Spacejock: Junk Clunk
Hal Spacejock: Snatch-22
Hal Spacejock: Bored of the Wings
Hal Spacejock: Fly Hard
Hal Spacejock: Calamity Report
Hal Spacejock: Dumb Radar
and
Hal 10: The Neverending Story
Hal's not Carry-on style humour, so I won't actually be using any of the more, er, suggestive titles. Don't worry about whether they work or not - just fire away and try to collect a prize when the dust settles.
I sometimes have to stand up and talk about my books in front of whole rooms full of school kids. Some of these titles would have me talking about my books in a room full of lawyers and judges ;-)
Hal Spacejock: Smoky Portal
Hal Spacejock: Malfunctions
Hal Spacejock: Bequest
Hal Spacejock: Heritage
Or, perhaps:
Hal Spacejock: Primogeniture
Hal Spacejock: Genetic Endowment
Hal Spacejock: Birthright
Cheers!
Robin
Hal Spacejock: After Five
Hal Spacejock: Cheese and Whine
Hal Spacejock: Beyond the Planet of the Zombie Flight Attendants
HS: Sticky Parts
"Port De Jour"
"Port Snort"
"Port A Let"
"Abort Port"
"Port-a-licious"
Port Whine
Mint Mien
After Dinner Mint
Is tThat a Bottle of Port in Your Pocket or Are Aou Just Glad to See Me? [I know, you can't use this one. ;-) ]
Hal Spacejock: Sub Port
HS: Shrinking Asteroids
HS: Free Lunch (with your Heinlein homage, natch)
Simon,
some ideas taking on the food theme.
Hal Spacejock: Subspace Banquet
Hal Spacejock: Food for thought
Hal Spacejock: Stellar Smorgasborg
Hal Spacejock: Chew and Spew
Hal Spacejock: Regurgitated
Hal Spacejock: A bit on the side
Hal Spacejock: Midnight Snack
Hal Spacejock: On a binge
Hal Spacejock: Forced Diet
Hal Spacejock: Hold the Sauce (or Ketchup)
Hal Spacejock: Extra Serve
Hal Spacejock: Out to lunch
Hal Spacejock: Taking Orders
Hal Spacejock: Foot in mouth
Hal Spacejock: Space Cannibals
Hal Spacejock: Eat my Hat (or Helmet)
Hal Spacejock: Gravy Stains
Good to see there are plans for future HS.
Michael H
Hi Simon.
It's got to be
"Cheese and crackers."
This happens before Port and definitely before the big bang.
Hope you like it.
Vicki
I like some of the zany ideas so far. That last one prompted another:
Hal Spacejock: Seasoned Hackers
'WD 40 Junkie'
HS: My way or bugger off - the Spacejock guide to customer service.
HS: Lousy, late and lost - tales of an interstellar courier.
HS Eats and Runs: the Gastro-colic Reflex Strikes Back
there could be an attempt on a beautiful actresses life and Hal has to protect her
You haven't met Hal, have you? ;-)
He'd give all the assurances in the galaxy, then order Clunk to protect her.
Mintal Stimulation
And what if the copy-editor goes all the way through the book changing mintal to mental huh? huh? ;-)
HS Eats and Runs
Yes, he does. Usually on someone else's dime.
HS: Supernova Sunrise
That sounds like a euphemism for a truly voluminous spew.
HS: Shrinking Asteroids
Because Space is Cold!
HS: Spacedump
HS: Spacejunk
HS: Spacecadets Unlimited
HS: Make Mine a Double - Double Awesome
HS: With A Side of Sexy
HS: To Ports Unknown
mary
paddocke@centurytel.net
khaldun said:
"Hal-leluliah"
nuff said
khaldun:
zafri106@hotmail.com
"Moondance"
"The customer is never right"
HS: The umpire strikes back
HS: Space Girls
HS: Follow the yellow prick road (don't ask)
HS: Creature from the Black Hole
or simply
HS: Clunk clunk clunk
It's probably obvious but maybe I should elaborate on the title Space Girls.
Hal meets five girls, named Hyper Space, Cyber Space, Chilly Space, Back Space and Empty Space.
They are wannabe pilots and Hal is not the right person to teach them how to become one. When they ask him, "Who do you think you are ?", Hal tells them he works for an interuniversal record company, and soon Hal finds out that you can lie too much...
And here are a few more title-suggestions.
HS: Halabaloo
HS: The winner takes it Hal
HS: Chip Shipment
When Hal meets girls his vocal chords turn to spaghetti. So, they end up saying Goodbye
I like the Umpire Strikes Back - all kinds of gags about sticky wickets and third legs. Then again, there was that DNA book with Krikket which I couldn't finish... and Lucas would probably sue my arse off.
A few more:
HS: Turn of Speed
HS: Moonlight Gonada
HS: Pithing Contest
You want "Port" in it?
check this:
"HS: Stop or Top"
u see it?
Yours
Markus from Florence
H.S.: Any port in a storm.
HS End Of Space
To stay with the HS Goes Postal images.
HS: Fed-hexed
Though they'll probably sue you for that. Well, bad publicity is publicity, too. ;)
1st, a somewhat punny title:
Barbers and Hairsay
2nd, a somewhat bunny title:
Rabbitholes and Haresay
3d, a somewhat pony title:
Foal Play
4th, a somewhat phony title:
In space, no one hears your call
Hehehe - I'm not nearly clever enough, but I've thoroughly enjoyed your post and comments.
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